Monday, October 27, 2008
I learnt an important lesson about love.
If you love someone enough, you wouldn't bother if the love you gave is assymmetrical against you. The disclaimer to this statement is that, the person who is giivn the love have to realize that he or she is giving more love that he or she is taking back and is still happy giving. Ignorant giving is thus excluded from the statement because if you don't even realize that the love you are giving is asymmetrical you won't know how you would feel if you realize it one day. Morever, from my personal observations people who usually get so caught up in giving and fails to look at the whole issue objectively are desperately trying to give such that they get comfoted in either the act or giving or something that they percieve they can gain if they continue giving. That of course, is not love but rather selfishness.
Innocence
11:45 AM
Saturday, October 25, 2008
From the moment I saw you
From the moment I looked into your eyes
There was something about you I knew, I knew
That you were once in a lifetime
A treasure near impossible to find
And I know how lucky I am to have you
Cause I've seen rainbows that could take your breath away
The beauty of the setting sun, on any given day
And when it comes to shooting stars I have seen a few But I've never seen anything as beautiful as youI can't believe that I have you
I can't believe that you're here in my arms
I've been waiting a life time for you, for you
And I've dreamed about you
Pictured in my mind who I would see
But I never imagined just how beautiful you'd be
Cause I've seen rainbows that could take your breath away
(take your breath away)
The beauty of the setting sun, on any given day (any given day)
And when it comes to shooting stars I have seen a few
But I've never seen anything as beautiful as you
I've seen rainbows that could take your breath away
(take your breath away)
The beauty of the setting sun, on any given day
And when it comes to shooting stars I have seen a few
But I've never seen anything as beautiful
But I've never seen anything as beautiful as you
From the moment I saw you
From the moment I looked into your eyes
Innocence
12:45 PM
I have a confession to make. My QT hasn't been up to par recently due to the fact that I am always spending time out, getting a huge backlog of work and thus not willing to do anything that is considered " recreation". Obviously that is a mindset flaw on my side and so here I am trying to change it. I need to and I want to spend more time with God even if it means that I have to sacrifice some of my play times. *Nods*
In any case, before I start the reflections for today, here are some thanksgiving. I wanna thank God for my bf who is indeed my soul mate and is so understanding about my cirumstances and times when I just kick a big fuss out of nothing. I also thank God for him as he loves God as much as I do. I thank God for a companion in my life journey.
I also thank God for that fact that everything always turns out right no matter what. I worry and worry about 101 things only to look back when the incident ended and say, hey, God always had itr in his hands anyway, what's so worrying about them all? I was merely wasting my efforts being paranoid about random things. Thank you God for helping me through everything. I may not see You face to face and sometimes I don't feel you around but I can always see Your deeds for me.
I thank God for making me who I am. I know I used to hate myself because I was too loud, too independent, too unsocial etc but only to realize that God had made me this way for a particular purpose. I guess if God never made me this way, I would never have met my bf and yes, share such enjoyable moments with him. On the same note, if God hadn't made me the way I am, I would never have met such great frens (you know who you are) who are much more loyal, intelligent, sensible etc than all those frens that I wanted when I was a kid.
You know what's the true beauty of thanksgiving, it is that at the end of the day, you realised that life isn't that bad and more than that life is good. And on retrospect, God is really everywhere and there is a sense of comfort knowing that no matter how far your strayed, how much wrong stuff you have done, He is still around. And everytime I think of that, I just want to spend more time admiring Him and His love.
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The reason why this post is termed Purposeful thanksgiving is that on attending a fren's grandma service and my subsquent bible readings reminded me of the purpose of life. I guess when school work piles up, and when I spend a lot of time with half the world (except God, oops,sorry God) the purpose gets misty. It's not that I don't know what I am supposed to do but rather, in the light of all the things going on, I convienently forget (hey, I am not endorsing it okay). Maybe that's why we must spend QT everyday with Him. When we stop spending time with Him, we will start to forget His attributes and it becomes easy to be caught up with myself and my world and all the anxieties set in and you start feeling extremely miserable because life loses its meaning.
Okay I am seriously too good in getting out of point. We were talking about funeral yes. Well, the preacher(in Chinese btw) reminded us that Earth is not our final destination and if Earth is not our final destination then we wouldn't buy properties, cars or things here but in any case we can't bring these stuff into heaven. He then illustrated his point with a story about this miner who found a piece of gold. Being a poor miner, he treated the piece of gold like a treasure and when he went to heaven with that piece of gold. The angel told him, why are you holding a piece of road gold (lousy translation) and he was defending his gold saying that it's a precious gem not some road gold.The angel then told him, in heaven, all the roads are lined with gold like what he was holding in his hand and there are so much that gold is simply commonplace.
Putting the story into perspective, whatever materiallistic things we are seeking so hard now are at the end of the day, nothing in heaven. If that is so, why do we try so hard to seek for things that don't last? As what the preacher said, we come with nothing and we leave with nothing as well so therefore it makes more sense to live life in a way that means something to God. Today's QT I read a passage on 2 Tim 4:6-7
For I am already being poured out as a drink offering and the time of my departure has come. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.Paul said the following towards the end of his life to his protege Timothy and I thought it summed up pretty clearly what I want to achieve at the end of that day. Paul did not say stuff like I have earned so much in my business or even I have converted so many people to Christ etc. The stuff that he was felt he had completed was immaterial. It was a matter of the heart. Fought the good fight, tried his best to fight against whatever that came his way. The main point was not whether he won or not but rather, he did not give up, he fought all out. I have finished the race, again he did not quantify the "finished", but rather, just doing all that is required that God had asked him. It's not about getting the results but rather finishing what He had called you. finally, I have kept the faith.I think to me, the word faith, like what Pastor Edmund said, it's obey. Obeying God no matter what He said, coz you believed in all of Him. Again not quanitified at all, it's a matter of posture rather than a set of actions. It reminded me strongly of what people always said, God bothers about the process not the results.
The first line of the verse said, I am being poured out like a drink offering and I remembered a few years back when I was first introduced to the verse, the image of a drink offering completely poured out appeared in my mind. The same image came back to me and all I could say was, when I die and meet Him in heaven, I want to say stuff as Paul said. I want to leave without regrets.
Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all cirumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you -1 Thess 5:16-18
Innocence
11:51 AM
